The Economy: A Layman's Perspective

While the news media, politicians, and the President are telling us the economy is improving, I'm having a difficult time seeing it from where I am sitting in the great state of Texas. Allow me to explain from my position as an untrained economist.

Every week someone from my friends list on Facebook announces a job loss. Sometimes, the spouse is able to pick up extra hours and make up the difference. Other times, they have a trade that allows them to quickly find a new job. But, many remain out of work. It has almost become an unspoken rule that if you run across a job (that you will not be applying for) that you share it with your friends on Facebook. Unfortunately, the job posts are as rare as the job loss announcements are common.

With each out of work person, the family must cut the budget to meet the new income level. Contrary to the news media's analysis, this doesn't make for a recovering economy. How do I know this? I am by no means a trained economist. But, experience can be a great teacher.

We learned yesterday that my husband lost one of his jobs. Yes, he works more than one. When you have a special needs child, the medical bills are insurmountable. I'm not at liberty to go into the amount of bills my son accumulates each year but to give you a hint he is three years old and just had his fourth major surgery. He will have his fifth surgery by year's end.

With the loss of one job means the loss of a third of our income. We must cut our household budget by one third. We were not living extravagantly but definitely did not have a tight budget. With the loss of salary, there will be no more eating out, no more movies, no more lattes, no books, no crafting supplies, no more driving that is not absolutely necessary, no more cookies and ice cream in the grocery cart, and I will return to the use of coupons to save every penny possible. My trusted travel companion, my SUV, will remain parked in the driveway. We can't afford to fill the tank with today's gas prices approaching $4 a gallon. Instead, my husband and I will share the economy car.

Now, here's your challenge: How many retailers will be hit by our job loss? How much money will no longer be added to the local economy? And to add to your numbers, my husband wasn't the only one laid off his job. There were others. So, add their income, budget cuts, and the retailers affected to the list.

We know numerous teachers have lost their jobs due to school districts cutting their budgets. We also know that Blockbuster (a distributor is in our area) laid off a lot of employees recently. We were enjoying Chili's burgers recently when half the restaurant was filled with employees who lost their jobs that very day. They were "celebrating" life one last time before going home to cut their budgets to their new income level. How many retailers were affected by the jobs lost at Blockbuster alone?

Despite the push to blame the business owner, large or small, for not hiring workers and for laying them off. The true blame should be placed on government as a whole. Budget talks are going on right now on Capital Hill and to no avail. My husband and I cut all non-essentials from our budgets when income drops. Capital Hill must do the same. I can name numerous budget items in the city that employs my husband that should have been cut from the budget as non-essential items. I mean, really, do we need a brand new bridge that runs parallel to an existing bridge with no problems whatsoever. According to the city, we do. Why? Because the old bridge isn't pretty and the new one will be. I could go on and on just about this one city. In the end, they cut my husband's salary and all the other city employees' salaries by five percent and gave them unpaid days off. I rather doubt one bridge will add as much stimulus to the economy as thousands of employees in the city.

I'm sure there are many more examples nationwide and on Capital Hill. When government cuts the non-essentials out of their budgets, then maybe we can add the non-essentials back into our budget thus boosting the economy.

The Irony of Life

I appreciate the irony of life. It is what makes the world turn. Without it, everything would be completely and totally boring.

But, in this case, irony has me beating my head against the wall and kicking myself. To fully understand the irony, let's backtrack to last year and my wonderful adoration of all the hummingbirds visiting my feeders. I had three different types of hummingbirds visiting my feeders on a regular basis. I identified two of the varieties but the third I couldn't identify. I took pictures and compared them to website photos and databases. I spent all winter researching hummingbirds and looking for this incredibly small species. This hummingbird was about half the size of the black-chinned and ruby-throated varieties that I had already identified. And there were no hummingbirds of that size in our region. The only one even remotely matching the description resides in Montana and never leaves the mountains. I found it impossible to believe that a mountainous species would survive the 100 degree plus temperatures of Texas.

With the advent of spring, I no longer had time to research the hummingbird, so waited for it to make its appearance this year for a better look. For the record, I have not yet seen this tiny species this year.

Fast forward to today, I had not been to my garden in several days. Due to all that has been going on, my garden was in great need of attention. After dinner, Snugglebug and I ventured out to the garden so I could see what all needed to be done after he went to bed. I immediately noticed my tall, lush tomato plants were mere stems. This disturbed me, but being a life-long farm-girl, I knew the work of a hornworm when I saw it. It didn't take me but a moment to find the fat culprit lounging on a naked stem. Then, I found a second and a third hornworm.

After putting Snugglebug to bed, I went straight out to my garden (baby monitor in hand) to search for any more tomato eating fiends. What began with three worms became ten then twenty. At twenty-five hornworms, I called my friend, Liz, and said, "You're not going to believe this!" She did and hung up so she could go check her tomato plants. The final count was 28 hornworms on three tomato plants! I would have taken a picture but the sight of them turned my stomach, and I would hate to run off my readers with such a sight.

After plucking the worms and depositing them in a large (very large) pickle jar, I turned on the sprinklers and came inside to do some research.

I first wanted to know what type of moth the hornworm became so I could make sure to spray it with Raid the next time I saw one. I also wanted to know what the pupae looked like and what ate it so I could prevent the hornworm ever reaching my tomato plants.

I learned that the hornworm becomes a moth that when in flight looks like a hummingbird. It eats nectar just like a hummingbird, feeds on flowers just like a hummingbird, has the same long tongue, and from a distance looks like an extremely small hummingbird. The photos and the description on all the websites matched the unknown hummingbird from last year. I sat in complete astonishment. Last year, I had been feeding and marveling at a moth, not a bird. Last year, I had been feeding the moth that would lay the eggs and become a hideous larvae known as the hornworm that was now eating my tomato plants.

The irony is too much to bear. And while I typically admire irony and say, "My hat's off to you for pulling that one off," today, I say, "cussword, cussword, cussword."

Take a close look...No, closer

So, this lovely lady has taken up residence in our backyard, beyond my garden.

She is a Killdeer. She is ground nesting bird who has a very sad sounding chirp. She makes an even more distressing broke wing limp when you get too close to her nest. The idea is that the ground dweller will be led away by the enticing thought that the injured bird will be easily caught. She will lead the prey quite a ways away before taking flight. She then makes sure the prey is far from her nest before she returns.

Here's a picture of the nest.
Oh, you don't see it. Well, that's the way it's meant to be. I searched at least an hour this afternoon and could not find her nest. This evening while working in my garden, I kept a close eye on the little bird and followed her visually back to her nest. Even with a reference point, I had a tough time finding the nest. It blends in with the ground so well that one could literally step right over it and never see it.





Here's another photo of the nest. Take a close look at this photo then go back and take a closer look at the photo above.



Now, do you see it.










Here's one last, even closer, look at the nest and eggs. Can you see how they would be lost even though they sit right out in the open? Amazing! Simply Amazing!











PS For those who would like to see a better view of the little bird (I don't have a long camera lens.) click this link to a Wikipedia photo.

We Have Sentences, People!

We had our first sentences, today! They were only two word sentences but subject verb just the same. Prior to this we have had a lot of two word combos but more like adjective noun or a please attached to a noun or a name attached to a request.

What were the sentences you ask? I'm so glad you did!

Wot dis! (interpreted: Watch This!) While climbing over the sofa (that's another post)

i bo. (interpreted: It Broke) Referring to a nickel yo-yo he received from a recent birthday party as a party favor.

Only 6 months ago, we had our first verbal words. He still signs and most of the time will sign one word and say the other word. Other times he signs and says the word both. Most of the time the word is only the first consonant which renders the spoken word useless without the sign. His verbal speech has surpassed his signs though, so at times there is frustration when he can't get across what he is talking about. We are working on that! My husband and I are taking a class in sign language with the goal of being able to communicate with him via sign and teach him the same way verbal communication is taught. We are well on our way with an excellent teacher!

The Quest for Encouragement: The Church's Part

A friend on Facebook, recently, posted a link to an article, titled "How to Find a Good Church". It is less about how to find a church and more about what a good church looks like. It is a fantastic article, and I chose to share it with my friend's list.

There was one line in the article that drew particular interest to me and has sparked a bit of conversation. Conversation is always good, especially when it involves children with special needs and their families.

Half-way into the article, the author states, "The tragedy of modern Christianity is that when members of the body hurt, too often we relegate them to finding resources outside the walls of the church. " The article is not necessarily referring to families who have special needs children but to hurts in general. But, the statement still holds true. Within my own county in Texas, I can name only one church that has teachers who are trained to work with children who are deaf, autistic, or who have various delays. There are a few churches who provide interpreters for the deaf but that's a whole other blog post.

The question of starting a ministry in this area arose in our conversation, but I think it is more about attitude and education than ministry. I'm not sure what type of ministry would be specifically set-up outside of the typical support groups. It is more about an overall attitude of both the membership and the church's leadership of acceptance, encouragement, and education. It may not be cancer but 7q11.23 duplication can be very trying, frustrating, and even heart breaking.

I know the same is true for families who have down syndrome, autism, and other genetic disorders. One person told me recently, "Raising a child with special needs is a lonely job." It shouldn't be. The church should be surrounding them with encouragement and prayer. Members of the church should be the one of the first to educate themselves on the disorder, not to mention be there with constant encouragement.

This is not to say I, personally, don't have educated and encouraging friends. I do. But sadly, I can count on one hand those who have personal knowledge of my trials and are willing to be a shoulder to cry on and a voice of encouragement when I need it most.

But, so you don't feel like I am singling out the church, the same is true even within family. It is hard for family members to accept that a child does not meet the same norms as their other nieces, nephews, cousins, or grandchildren. It is easier to just ignore the issues. It is also hard for some within family to listen because they feel it is more about attention-getting than anything else. Acceptance within family is difficult on so many levels, and I am not the one to even begin unraveling the psychology behind that. There are others much more qualified.

The purpose of this post is to merely say that families with special needs children need more encouragement than the typical family. You don't have to provide answers. You don't even need to fully comprehend the issues at hand. You don't need a special degree or a ministry leader. All you need is a merciful and caring heart and a listening ear. Sometimes all we need is someone to hear our story or let us talk through our emotions without those emotions being dismissed. Our children may not be dying but it is an emotional journey all the same.

*Note: If you want a better glimpse into the emotions of a parent with special needs, I invite you to read Amsterdam International. Written by Dana Nieder, the mother of a child with an undiagnosed genetic disorder, she explains what it is like to land where you least expect it and just how frustrating and lonely it can become.

You can also read my article, The Quest for Encouragement: Are You in the Airport or Not?

Book Review: Story Engineering

I loved this book! If you are a fiction writer of any type, then this book is for you. Larry Brooks an author himself writes about more than just the basics of a good character or conflict. He delves into the deeper aspects of what it takes to create a good character and a good conflict. He tells you what the reader expects, the editor expects, and what you should expect from your writing. He uses examples from well-known books, TV shows, and movies. He doesn't stick with just one genre of movie or book to prove his point.He pulls from all genres to show just how important the information is.

Divided into eight parts, the author details what he calls "Six Core Competencies" as well as an opening chapter explaining why this book is different than all the others you have previously read on writing(And yes, it is!), and the final chapter which talks about the development process and pulls everything all together.

As I read this book, I began to see the holes in my own writing. I haven't been able to figure out why I wasn't happy with my characters and my stories but now it is plain as day as though a doctor sat down and diagnosed my problems.

I give this book 5 stars. It will be one that I read more than once.

We've Come A Long Way, Baby!

We have past yet another milestone. This one won't be on your growth charts. And, really, it shouldn't be called a milestone but a mile marker.

We have just finished surgery #4 on our little Snugglebug. This particular surgery wasn't anything serious. It was just tubes in the ears and adenoids out. I say "just" but no surgery is "just" a surgery. Every surgery is a big deal as it requires IV's and anesthesia and knives and exposure to dozens of different types of 'cocuses. Surgery is a scary thing for anyone of any age. For a mommy to send her little one away with a bunch of strangers to be cut on and exposed to 'cocuses this is no easy thing. Stress abounds!

But, this surgery was a milestone in that after four surgeries you know pretty well what to expect, how to handle it, and how to deal with the stress. The stress is still there but you learn how to handle it.

Snugglebug's first surgery was at seven months of age. He had to have surgery on a lazy eye. His lid was literally sown open so he could see. The procedure is way more complicated than that. It's called Ptosis. You can google it if you are really interested, but I won't bore you with the details. I was a nervous wreck the day of the surgery. I had no idea what to bring to the hospital and even though I was told it would take less than half an hour, I packed to stay at the hospital for days.

The worst part of that first surgery was afterwards. Not knowing what was happening or why he was feeling so out-of-it, Snugglebug cried inconsolably for well over an hour. We were at a loss as to how to help him.

Surgery #4 was different than the first in so many ways. We've come a long way in three years! I was calm as could be. I prepared Snugglebug the night before by telling him he had an early morning doctor's appointment and that we would leave before he could eat breakfast. I left out the part about the hospital. Once we were at the hospital, he knew exactly what he was there for and wasn't happy about it at all. I wasn't worried at all about this. Even at three, he has a right to express his opinion on the subject.

After the surgery, my little man seemed to know exactly what he was feeling and why. The anesthetic was wearing off and he was waking up. He cried and fussed but not much. He was woozy but seemed to be focusing internally to gather his wits about him. Knowing my child as I do, I just stayed close to his bed. (My child doesn't like to be held when he is sick. That's a whole other post.) As he became more aware of his surroundings, he finally decided he wanted his Daddy. Once he was in his daddy's arms, he relaxed and drifted in and out of sleep.

There was no inconsolable crying. Snugglebug has traveled this road as well. Despite his young age, he has learned so much about surgeries and how to handle them. It is at times like this that I wish I could crawl into his brain and hear his thoughts. I would like to know what he has learned.

I could go on and on about what I have learned about surgeries, hospitals, the bills that go along with both, and so on. Surgery #4 is a milestone because we have learned that for us this is part of life. We have learned how to handle the stress, the frustration, and the bills. And that's not just my husband and I, that goes for Snugglebug as well. He has learned so much!

By evening, my child was back to normal. You would never know he had had surgery eight hours earlier. He was running and playing like always.

I am so full of emotion that I can't even begin to put it into words. We have past such an incredible mile marker. It is not one that I would hope everyone would achieve, but for us it registers a long list of invaluable lessons that we have collected over the course of four surgeries. Words don't convey how proud I am of Snugglebug who has learned all this on his own. Words don't convey how proud I am of my husband and myself for learning how to lean on one another and work as a team in times like this. Words do not convey the lessons we have learned and will rely on even when we are not walking into a surgery.

It is odd that at the end of the day, as I reflect, I consider this to be normal for us. It is not a big deal, and it is just another surgery. The milestone we have crossed is called acceptance. Acceptance is a huge milestone for special needs parents.

We've come a long way, and it has only been three years! What could possibly be waiting for us over the next fifteen!